Why And How To Accept Ourselves
Have you noticed how good your day is when you wake up and feel happy right from the moment you opened your eyes? Self-esteem has a fundamental role in our daily lives, the easier we accept who we are, the faster we start working on making our dreams come true.
Becoming self-conscious of why you are the way you are, makes it easier to realize what you would like to change about it, but also allows us to understand that some things can’t be changed (at least form one day to another) and that we can actually live happily accepting us the way we are.
Today I would love to tell you why you should accept yourself before making any major changes in your life, and then I will give you some tips to achieve self-acceptance to help you gain some confidence and give you some strength to keep on moving.
Why Accepting Ourselves Is So Important
Some people believe they walk around life with a giant black cloud above their heads, they call it bad luck, karma, and other names just to feel like they don’t have control over it, but the truth is quite different.
There are some things we can’t truly change, but what we can actually do is change the way we face them. For example: maybe we have some extra pounds and want to lose them, but you also have troubles committing yourself with exercise.
If you see how beautiful you already are and how even more beautiful you could be, making a routine like going to the gym after work will be less exhausting, because you get a different motivation: improving something, instead of changing it from the root.
Self-acceptance is something we can nurture, it takes time and effort, but being able to see who you really are is totally worth it.
Constantly rejecting the way you feel or look sabotages your entire view of life, and it will irremediably affect the way you deal with troubles, interact with other people and makes everything in life so much harder!
Not accepting yourself makes you feel unhappy, causes you trouble with your confidence, makes you develop low self-esteem and makes you pursue the wrong goals in life, it’s basically a giant waste of time and great experiences.
So if you are feeling low, don’t know how to wake up in the morning without feeling sad, if it’s hard for you to look yourself in the mirror, if you avoid social interactions because you don’t feel “cool enough”, here are some tips to help you accept yourself.
Stop Comparing Yourself With Others
We all have different skills and we move in different contexts, comparing yourself with that coworker that gets promoted often is useless if you just feel jealousy and don’t start analyzing why that’s happening.
Maybe they have it easier at home, or they study harder, or they challenge themselves more often than you do.
Independently of the reason they are doing better than you, the important thing is to see how you evolve daily, and if there’s something you know it’s not well done, you now see what it is and you can learn how to change it.
You can be a better person than yesterday every day.
Define Yourself By Your Achievements
When you stop seeing how bad you are at something and instead try seeing how good you are at something else, you notice that you are not useless at all, you just have different skills that can be used in a different context.
Don’t be so hard on yourself! Compare your progress with how you were a few days ago if you are learning something new and it’s getting harder to keep going, stop for a few minutes and notice how much you have learned until that day.
If you just focus on what you are doing wrong, you feel stuck in life and you lose motivation easier, which only delays your trip to happiness.
Create Your Support System
Friends and family are the two pillars for self-acceptance, sometimes is good to see ourselves from the eyes of the people who love us, they see the good things in us way faster than we do.
If you surround yourself with negative people that complaints constantly instead of looking for solutions, people that criticize you often or simply somebody that takes away the light of your life with their bad energy, you need to make some changes.
Get rid of the people that don’t provide anything good in your life, and pamper those that show you the good and the bad parts of you for your personal growth.
What’s in the past does not stay in the past forever, but you can learn to live with it.
Forgive yourself for being clumsy on a date, for always being late, for not looking like a supermodel, for emotionally hurting someone.
Constantly remembering the past and feeling bad for something you did or the way you acted interferes with your self-acceptance.
Instead of always feeling regrets, you can analyze the situation that haunts you, recognize what you did wrong, why you did it and how you can avoid repeating it.
It not only lets you see more clearly how your mind works; it also pushes you to move on.
Do Something That Makes You Feel Amazing Every Day
Help someone that really needs it, instead of exploding towards somebody, count to ten, breath and try to see things their way.
See how good looking you are, and if you don’t feel that handsome or pretty that day, take a good shower! Comb your hair, wear a killing outfit, something that lets you see, at least for a minute, that you may not be perfect, but you do are beautiful.
Learn new stuff, do some exercise, go to a karaoke bar, grab a drink with your friends, tell your parents you love them, say you are sorry.
You see, it’s not about trying to be perfect, it’s about understanding that we all have our pros and cons and that accepting ourselves the way we are will help us be a better person.
The change does come from within, but we must decide that we want it, even if we don’t completely understand what kind of change.
Also, remember that there are others out there having the same struggle you are having, so being kind without expecting anything in return will make everyone’s live, included yours, easier.
There’s no need to be rude with others, and before getting into a fight, stand back and think if it’s really worth it.
Image By: Anton Belitskiy